Time out

Sex toy

Still trying to decide what to get your Redneck best friend?... Worry no more!

A real tractor pull

Japanese Rednecks

Redneck baby carriage

I'm my own grandpa

Muppet Style!!!

Roadsign game

Redneck Granny

Redneck granny

Toodles??????????!!!!!!!!

Redneck injunooity

New AC

This is one way to get the AC fixed in your car :)

Walmart Greeter

The perfect Wal-Mart Greeter

A very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walks into WalMart with her two kids in tow, screaming obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.

The WalMart Greeter says, "Good morning and welcome to Walmart, nice children you've got there - are they twins?"

The ugly woman stops screaming long enough to say, "Hell no they ain't, the oldest one, he's 9 and the younger one, she's 7. Why the hell would you think they're twins?........ Do you really think they look alike?"

"No", replies the greeter, "I just couldn't believe you got laid twice!"

DAMN!!

Upgrade!

Some rednecks are high falootin'... they don't live in dem stinky trailor homes!

Redneck Bass Boat

What would you do if you won the lotto?

Redneck Storm Shelter

With all the tornados we have been having....I'm thinking of investing in one of these!!!

Road Block

One day, two rednecks named Bubba and Earl were driving down the road, drinking a couple of Buds.

The passenger, Bubba, said "Lookey thar up ahead Earl, it's a po-leece roadblock!

We're gonna get busted fer drinkin' these here beers!"

"Don't worry Bubba," Earl said.

"We'll just pull over and finish drinkin' these beers, peel off the label and stick it on our foreheads, then throw the bottles under the seat."

"What fer?" asked Bubba.

"Just let me do the talkin', okay?" said Earl.

They finished their beers, threw the empty bottles under the seat and slapped the labels on their foreheads.

When they reached the roadblock, the sheriff said, "Have you boys been drinking?"

"No sir," said Earl, "we're on the patch."

Summary of the Redneck

Hogs & Chicks

Jesus and the redneck

An Irishman in a wheelchair entered a restaurant one afternoon and asked the waitress for a cup of coffee. The Irishman looked across the restaurant and asked,

"Is that Jesus sitting over there?"

The waitress nodded "yes," so the Irishman told her to give Jesus a cup of coffee on him.

The next patron to come in was an Englishman with a hunched back. He shuffled over to a booth, painfully sat down, and asked the Waitress for a cup of hot tea. He also glanced across the restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus over there?" The waitress nodded, so the Englishman said to give Jesus a cup of hot tea, "My treat."

The third patron to come into the restaurant was a Redneck on crutches. He hobbled over to a booth, sat down and hollered, "Hey there, sweet thang. How's about gettin' me a cold glass of Coke!!" He, too, looked across the restaurant and asked, "Is that God's boy over there?" The waitress once more nodded, so the Redneck said to give Jesus a cold glass of Coke, "On my bill."

As Jesus got up to leave, he passed by the Irishman, touched him and said, "For your kindness, you are healed." The Irishman felt the strength come back into his legs, got up, and danced a jig out the door.

Jesus also passed by the Englishman, touched him and said, "For your kindness, you are healed." The Englishman felt his back straightening up, and he raised his hands, praised the Lord and did a series of back flips out the door.

Then Jesus walked towards the Redneck.

The Redneck jumped up and yelled, "Don't touch me...I'm drawin' disability."